Weed users in certain states live in constant fear of being called in for a drug test. In California for example, marijuana is legal for recreational use. However, the state’s employers can fire staff if they test positive for THC in a drug test, even if the cannabis was used outside of work hours and off company grounds.
Professional athletes must also tread carefully. In March 2018, MMA fighter Cynthia Calvillo was banned for nine months after testing positive for weed. A desperation to pass impending drug tests means people do some silly things. They will pay significant sums of money for garbage products, consume potentially deadly toxic chemicals, and dilute their urine.
None of these tactics work, yet thousands of people persist. Why? Because they have fallen into the trap of believing THC detox myths. In this article, we explore some of these falsehoods while hitting you with some knowledge bombs.
What is Detoxing?
When it comes to THC, detoxing is the process of abstaining from the consumption of cannabis to ultimately flush it from your system. The length of time it takes to complete the process depends on a variety of factors, with your level of usage top of the list. The detox process could lead to side effects such as anxiety, insomnia, reduction in appetite, headaches, and irritability.
If you merely abstain from marijuana usage, your system will eventually become clear of it, but this takes time. THC accumulates in your body as you continue smoking. Obviously, certain strains contain a lot more of the cannabinoid than others, but generally, the more marijuana you consume, the longer it takes for the THC to leave your system. The speed of metabolization varies from person to person and dictates how long the traces remain.
Abstinence alone won’t help you pass a drug test. By their very nature, these tests are designed to surprise you, so don’t expect to have much time to prepare, if any. This is a catastrophe for regular cannabis users. Even if you use marijuana once, it is likely to stay in your system for up to eight days.
For occasional users, it could be 15 days before you’re clean. Regular users ‘could’ take up to a month while some reports suggest heavy users would have to abstain for 77 days! If a person’s job is at stake because of an upcoming drug test at work, they will try some pretty dumb things to pass. Let’s take a look at some of the most prevalent THC detox myths and provide you with the reality.
Myth: You Can Pass a Test by Drinking Ungodly Amounts of Water
If you’ve ever wasted money on low-quality THC detox drinks, you’ll notice that the instructions always include washing down the beverage with several liters of water. Also known as ‘flushing’ or ‘dilution’, this myth suggests that consuming huge amounts of water will dilute your urine to the point where the THC in weed becomes undetectable.
Fact: It is Stupid… AND Dangerous
In extreme cases, excessive consumption of water can lead to hyperhydration. This in turn leads to electrolyte imbalance disease and, in very rare instances, death! If you dilute your urine too much, it will have a low specific gravity and creatinine level; both of which are picked up during the testing process.
Also, only 20% of THC is expelled from your body via urine. Approximately 15% is excreted via other bodily fluids such as sweat, while 65% is removed via fecal matter. In other words, you’re better off taking laxatives instead of drinking lots of water, but that’s another bad move!
Myth: Synthetic Urine is the Answer
If you go online, you’ll find a ton of companies selling fake urine. One of the strangest stories we’ve heard is of people using chicken noodle soup broth as a substitute for their pee.
Fact: Lab Tests are Sophisticated
Do you really think that a trained lab technician with years of urine analysis testing is going to be fooled by chicken broth? If the smell alone doesn’t give away the game, the chemical analysis will catch you. It’s a similar story with synthetic urine; while sellers claim they have perfectly matched the chemical formula for human urine, they are lying!
Myth: Natural Diuretics Are Effective in Flushing Toxins from the System
As you’re probably aware, diuretics are substances that increase urine production and output. Commonly used diuretics include coffee, tea, beer, cranberry juice, and any other beverage with caffeine. There are also detox drinks and medications such as Lasix or Modil available.
Fact: They Dilute Toxins, but they Don’t Eliminate Them
Diuretics will make you pee, but they don’t remove THC. Yes, they can flush toxins out of your system and decrease the concentration of metabolites in urine, but diuretic consumption is essentially the same as drinking lots of water for THC detoxing purposes. Diuretics speed up urination, but your sample will be diluted to the point where it arouses suspicion. Your test will be rejected, voided, or you’ll otherwise fail.
Myth: Household Products Can Help You with THC Detox
In what has fallen into the ‘old housewives tale’ category, there is a suggestion that everyday items such as vinegar, pickle juice, niacin, and even bleach can help remove THC from your system. As far as vinegar is concerned, the belief is that drinking it before a test will flush out your system or mask traces of THC.
As pickle juice is highly acidic, like vinegar, it is suggested that drinking it will dissolve drug metabolites and cleanse the urine. Niacin is vitamin B3, and is used to boost the metabolism while regulating blood pressure. As it dilates the blood vessels, it is assumed that niacin will flush THC out of the system. Finally, there are a few idiots who claim that drinking Drano or bleach will cleanse your body of THC. Don’t be one of these idiots — just don’t.
Fact: Science Says You’re Wasting Your Time
When you consume vinegar, it mixes with gastric enzymes and stomach acid to change your urine’s pH level. It doesn’t cause any impact on weed metabolites and is likely to give you an upset stomach and a bad dose of diarrhea. Pickle juice’s only acid is acetic acid, the same as what’s in vinegar. It also contains a large amount of salt, which makes you thirsty and causes you to drink water.
There is no evidence that niacin will impact your urine’s THC content and an overdose will cause side effects such as dehydration, fever, dry skin, and itching.
Moreover, if you think that drinking bleach will help you pass a drug test, it is a surprise that you have a job at all! Even if it legitimately works, it could easily kill you. And as it happens, the ingredients in bleach and Drano don’t interact with any drugs or their metabolites.
Myth: Intense Exercise Leads to Rapid THC Detox
Of all the myths discussed so far in this piece, this is the one with the largest amount of truth attached to it. THC is stored in our body’s fat cells, so the more body fat you have, the longer it takes to detox. Exercise such as cardio and resistance training will boost your metabolism and burn fat. It also leads to a boost in anandamide production, which is a natural cannabinoid known as the ‘bliss’ molecule.
Fact: It Isn’t a Short-Term Fix
Everyone should exercise regularly to keep fit, healthy and ensure their weight remains under control. However, it is not a magic ‘get out of jail free’ card when it comes to fast THC detox. It can help you pass, but only when it is performed regularly and well in advance.
Drug metabolites are excreted via your urine, which means you have to stop exercising up to 48 hours before the test. This process decreases the THC level in the urinary tract and enables you to potentially provide a clean sample. However, it is a slow process and not one you can attempt in the week before a test.
Myth: You Can Claim to be a Passive Smoker
When all else fails, why not claim that you were in a room with heavy smokers and that’s the reason you didn’t pass the test?
Fact: You Can’t Inhale Enough Second-Hand Smoke to Use This as a Defense
Every drug test has a cut-off level. In most cases, a urinalysis for marijuana has its cut-off point at 50 nanograms per milliliter. Various tests have proven that you can’t reach that point via passive inhalation, even if you are in a room filled with cannabis users.
How Can I Perform a Proper THC Detox to Pass a Drug Test?
There are many ways to perform a safe and healthy THC detox if you don’t have a drug test looming. Here are some tips if you have time on your side:
- Abstinence: This is the most obvious entry on the list. You can’t be clean if you keep using!
- Exercise: As we mentioned above, losing fat speeds up the THC detox process.
Drink water: While it is a bad idea as an emergency method, drinking a few liters of water a day will help cleanse the system over time.
- Healthy diet: Try to avoid foods that are laden with fat, salt, and sugar. Such foods slow down your metabolism and increase retention of water. Choose lean meat, fruit & vegetables with an emphasis on leafy greens, because these are high in essential vitamins such as iron.
- Drink tea: Focus on liver-cleansing teas such as milk thistle or dandelion.
I’m Kind of in a Hurry Here!!!
You love using weed, of course, but tragically there is a company drug test scheduled in the next couple of days! Is it time to panic? Well, yes!
None of the above methods have any hope of working and, now that we have exploded a few myths, you’re all out of options… right? Not quite! There are ways and means of performing a quickfire THC detox, but none of them are close to being 100% effective. (Please bear this in mind before thinking the following advice is a golden ticket to a clean urine test).
Don’t Give Urine First Thing in the Morning
First and foremost, it is essential that your test is not your first urination of the day. Morning urine is darker than afternoon or evening pee because a number of unwanted substances will accumulate while you sleep. If you are a marijuana user, your first urination of the day will contain the highest concentration of THC. Therefore, make sure you pee at least once before the test.
Aspirin Works with Certain Tests
This is only an effective tactic for tests based on EMIT assay. It is a cheap test that involves the use of a strip dipped in a urine sample and is normally used for initial screening. A 1994 study by Wagener, Linder, and Valdes, published in Clinical Chemistry, showed that aspirin interferes with the EMIT assay by reducing its signals and helping to mask drug traces.
However, it is not entirely effective when used alone. It works best when mixed with other remedies and you should take four tablets around 4-5 hours before the test.
An adulterant is a substance added to urine to destroy or mask THC metabolites to provide a negative test result. While there are dozens of adulterants purported to work, only a small number are potentially effective. Iodine could destroy morphine, for example, but is less effective on THC.
Papain is an enzyme in papaya that, when added to a urine sample, reduces the concentration of weed metabolites by 50%. As well as working for initial and confirmation screening, papain is undetectable by standard adulteration tests.
Zinc Potentially Works
Zinc could potentially work, at least according to a 2011 study by Venkatratnam and Lents that was published in the Oxford Academic Journal of Analytical Toxicology. The two scientists found that zinc could block THC metabolites and decrease detection levels in urinalysis.
You can achieve the result by ingesting a zinc supplement or using it as an adulterant in zinc sulfate form. However, new methods of detecting zinc in urine tests have been recently developed, but if your test is analyzed by a lab using older methods, you may have a shot at sneaking through.
Certain Detox Drinks Appear to Work
The question of whether detox drinks work is a controversial topic. They are supposed to work by cleansing your system of THC. In most cases, these drinks act like diuretics, but contain supplements to help the urine look more legitimate.
For example, B-vitamins like B-2 and B-12 turn your urine yellow so it looks more natural. These beverages also contain creatine, which increases creatinine levels in the urine, and dietary fiber which ensures THC metabolites are redirected from the bladder to the colon.
As these drinks usually involve drinking plenty of water, your urine will be diluted but still look natural. Customer reviews reveal that some detox drinks are effective while others are complete garbage. One suspects that there is a lot of luck involved in some of these drinks, which probably mask THC rather than flushing it from the system.
Final Thoughts on THC Detox Myths
Regardless of what detox drink manufacturers claim, there is no guaranteed way to pass a urine test with a low enough level of THC to go undetected. If you use weed and have an impending drug test, you can try some rapid-fire THC detox methods, but none are guaranteed to work.
A popular emergency remedy involves drinking a concoction of fruit pectin and Gatorade around two hours before a test. Follow it with two more bottles of water and B-vitamins. Perhaps you can boost your chances further by adding zinc, papain, and aspirin to the mix, but these may not be effective depending on the kind of test it is. A lot of common detox methods are unhealthy, while others are downright dangerous and idiotic.
A truly effective THC detox could take weeks, depending on how much marijuana you use. Abstinence is essential and should be combined with increased water intake, exercise, and a healthier diet.
Not only will this lifestyle change speed up the THC detox process, it should help you get fitter and feel better in the long run. If you want a fast THC detox option, it is necessary to roll the dice. Otherwise, it is a good option for individuals in danger of developing a tolerance for weed.